Sacrifices made
by MariaW93
Summary: Dean and Sam Winchester lives in district 8. The story begins before the 48th hunger game. Dean does anything he can to keep Sam alive and thriving in the poorest district after their fathers death. This is the story of Deans life, his love for his brother and the lives he inspires. This is not a happy story. This story desperatly needs a Beta :) message me if interested.
1. Chapter 1

p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Dad, don't go. Please dad. Don't leave us." Dean begs his father again. The father that is currently standing in the doorway, dressed in a peacekeeper outfit he has stolen from work. "The only upside to living in district 8" he had told his son when he was caught sneaking home piece after piece of the uniform, "we have access to disguises when we need them." He had never told Dean what the uniform was for. Until now that is. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Dean, I have to go! I need to find district 13 and help them start a new rebellion. I need to avenge your mothers death." John looks at Dean with pleading eyes, as if begging Dean to understand. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean doesn't understand, district 13 was wiped from the face of the earth by nuclear bombs almost fifty years ago. There is no more district 13. They've had this argument before though. His dad conspires, and Dean tries to talk him out of it. He doesn't think that will work this time, so he tries a different approach. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Mom died in a fire at the factory dad, it was an accident. There is nothing to take revenge for! And what about S.." /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He's stopped from finishing the sentence by a shocking pain to his nose. He hadn't seen the punch coming. Dean blinks at his father through watery eyes, pain blooming from the center of his face. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"John looks furious, eyes wide and nostrils flaring. "Don't say that Dean. Don't ever say that!" it looks like he wants to shout, but he keeps it down to an enraged whisper. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"They've become good at having their arguments in hushed tones so the neighbors won't hear them. "Your mom would never have died at the factory if it wasn't for the Capitol. She wouldn't even have been in that place if it wasn't for them. So don't ever think that they aren't to blame." /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"His dad is staring at him, as if expecting realization to hit and for Dean to apologize. Dean doesn't. He can feel blood running from his nose, down his chin and soaking the only shirt he owns. He wants to yell at his father. Scream at him for always doing this, for making him worry. Making him take care of Sam, his little brother. Making him grow up too soon. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He wants to cry, because his face is starting to throb, and he wants someone to comfort him. The one that should be comforting him, however, is the one that inflicted the pain. Dean chooses to ignore it. He ignores the pain in his face, it's not like being hit is a new thing, and he ignores his own fear and sadness. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""What about Sam?" he tries instead. His last hope, because if his dad won't stay for Sam he won't stay for anything. For a short moment it actually looks like it's working. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"His dad looks over to the bed where the eleven year old is sleeping, growing too long for the blanket that covers him. John smiles softly at his son, but then he turns away and straightens. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""You're sixteen now Dean. You're old enough to take care of your brother." he hesitates, and Dean can actually see regret in his eyes. "I think we both know you've been more of a father to him than I have."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean wants to argue, wants desperately to deny the statement and tell his father that; "of course not, you've been a wonderful father to him", it wouldn't be the truth though. The truth is that John hasn't been much of a father to him or Sam after their mother died almost eleven years ago. He works a lot, he is off planning and conspiring a lot, and when he returns he is often angry and frustrated. On those nights Dean only has enough time to send Sam away, before his dad uses him as a punching bag to release the frustration. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""It doesn't have to be like that though, we can be a real family. Just don't go" he says instead, pleading with his dad one last time. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"John shakes his head defeatedly. "The Capitol stole any chance we had at being a normal family. I'm sorry Dean, I have to go. Take care of Sammy, and tell him I said bye." John takes one more look at his sons bloodied face, and Dean actually thinks he sees regret flashing in his fathers eyes before he closes his eyes, turns, and walks out the door. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean understands that he has lost, their father has left and he couldn't stop him. He's failed Sammy again. A tear breaks free and slips down his face. He angrily wipes it away, and his hand comes back bloody. Right, he has to clean that up before Sammy wakes up. He desperately needs to focus on the things he can change, the things he can do something with. He knows he'll fall apart right now if he doesn't, and he hasn't got time for that. He'll deal with thoughts of his father another time. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean is pretty sure Sam knows their father beats him, he's a smart kid. He always makes sure to clean up though. Sam might know whats going on, but Dean doesn't want him to actually have to face it. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He leaves the room he shares with, now, only Sam, and enters the kitchen they share with three other families. When this building was made, each apartment had apparently been meant for only one family. Now one family resides in a private room, and the kitchen and washroom is shared. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Your dad leave to then?" a voice interrupts Deans thoughts and he nearly has a heart attack. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He whips around and sees that Jo, daughter of the new family that moved in a week ago after the previous one had been kicked out, is standing by the kitchen table. She twists her long blond hair in slim fingers, in what could be seen as a nervous gesture, except she doesn't seem much like the nervous type to Dean. When he looks closer though, he can see traces of tears on her cheeks. Normally he despises show of emotion, and generally avoids girls and their 'overly emotional tendencies'. He knows his own face has traces of both blood and tears though, and he doesn't judge her for it. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He nods in reply to her question. "Yeah, off to look for" he trails off "I don't even know what he's looking for to be honest, revenge or something. He take your dad with him?"/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"br / She sighs and nods back at him. "I don't think he so much took my dad with him as they decided on the whole thing together, dad's been talking about leaving for years." She shrugs as if deciding to accept it and focus on other things, much like Dean did before leaving his room. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Your dad do that?" She asks, gesturing to the half-dried blood all over Deans face and shirt./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean makes a face and grimaces at the dried blood cracking on his face. "Yeah, he didn't much appreciate my attempts to stop him. I need to get cleaned up before Sammy wakes up. He shouldn't remember his dad like this."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Come on, I'll help you" Jo says, not arguing Deans hint that they won't ever se their fathers again. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"******br / /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"As it turns out, Dean is wrong. The previous night Jo had helped him clean up, and he had gotten a few hours sleep before he had to wake Sammy, explain to him where their dad was and take him to school. Sam's face had hardened as he took in Deans beginning black eye and swollen nose. When Dean explained that their dad had left and probably wasn't coming back Sam turned cold and told Dean in a detached voice; "Good, I don't ever want to see him again." Dean knows that isn't true, but he hadn't argued./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He is walking from the school on his way to work in the factory when he sees his dad. John is standing on the stage normally used only for the reaping. Next to him lies Jo's dad, in a pool of his own blood. The major is reading the charges against him; theft, attempted escape, treason. Before Dean has a chance to process what is happening one of the peacekeepers pulls out his gun and shoots his father in the face./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean has seen people die before. He has seen people wither away because of too little food and too much work. He has seen people frozen on the streets because they couldn't get warm. He has even seen the horrible, bloody murders in the games. It couldn't have prepared him for this though. For seeing his own fathers brains splattered all over the stage and one of the peacekeepers. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He doesn't realize he's running until he hits something hard and comes to an abrupt stop. The something hard turns out to be Jo. There are a million things they could say, but they both know nothing would help them feel any better. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Instead Dean holds out his hand. "Lets just go to work. We're going to need all the pay we can get, so we can't afford to loose our jobs." /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"*ONE YEAR LATER*/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean is hungry. He's hungry to the point where he isn't even hungry anymore, he is just nauseous and tired. He's been doing what he can for Sam since their father passed away. He went to the peacekeepers the day after to sign up for tesserae for himself and Sam. Meaning his name was added an additional 2 times to the reaping. It hadn't been enough though. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"The room he and Sam shares really isn't meant for only one income. Sam works after school, but It still isn't enough. The rooms all over town are meant for a family of at least four people, with at least three incomes. They had just managed when their dad was there, but now the money just doesn't cover it all. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean has refused Sam to take out tesserae, and he doesn't tell him how bad the situation is. For the past month Dean has been giving Sam most of the grain he should be eating. All the money they earn goes into paying for their room. He always makes sure Sam has enough to eat, but today marks two weeks of no food for Dean./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He knows he has to eat soon. Knows because he can't walk to work anymore without having to sit down several times so he won't faint. Knows from seeing other people starve to death that he isn't far behind. Knows because he didn't get any sleep tonight because of the flies crawling all over him, flies he knows wasn't really there. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He is sitting down for the fifth time on his way home from work when the peacekeeper approaches him. Dean doesn't even see him at first, too busy trying to make the dirty road in front of him stop spinning. When he does see the peacekeeper he's scared. He can't get in trouble, not now. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""I'm sorry, just taking a breather. I'll be on my way." He says and tries to stand up. He is almost upright when he falls, but the peacekeeper catches him before he hits the ground. Imagine that, being seventeen and dying of starvation he thinks, not knowing if he should laugh or cry. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Why don't you come inside with me?" the peacekeeper offers. "I'll give you some food." /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean almost snorts, it certainly looks like the peacekeeper has enough of it. Fat people are hard to come by in district 8, but if you do find one it's most likely a peacekeeper. The man stares down at him with dull eyes. Waiting for a reply./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""I haven't got any money" Dean tells him, internally beating himself for saying this before the food, not after. He can't get in trouble with the law though, he needs to be there for Sam. One of the reasons he hasn't tried stealing food. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Oh, I'm sure you'll find another way to pay me back" the peacekeeper says, smiling. "All you have to do is lie there and look pretty."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean suddenly understand what the peacekeeper wants in return for the food. He knows he should feel disgusted, knows he should walk away and never return. He knows this, but all he feels is relief. Relief and stupid that he hasn't thought of this before. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He has been working all the hours he can fixing machines at the factory, he isn't allowed to work more than he does. That doesn't mean he can't sell himself. Technically it's illegal, but the only ones interested in buying are the peacekeepers, and there are so many of them buying that the ones not interested doesn't bother arresting anyone for it. He won't get in trouble, Sammy won't get in trouble. They will keep their room and Dean won't die of starvation. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Yes" he says, "ok, show the way."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"The peacekeeper half drags half carries Dean to his apartment. Most peacekeepers that have a family are given a house, but seeing as this one lives in an apartment he is most likely single. Not that it would make much of a difference either way./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"When they walk through the door of the apartment Dean almost faints again, eyes swimming he tries to take in the place he just walked into. It's huge. Just from the door he can see a living room and three doors that most likely lead to a kitchen, bathroom and a bedroom. Just the living room is bigger than the whole quarter he shares with Sam and three other families. One of the walls in the living room is covered in books. Sam would absolutely love to get his hands one one of them. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"It's not that books are very rare in district 8, it's just that no one can really afford to own one. And the few families that did have used them to light the fireplace or tried to sell them off. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""So" the peacekeeper says. "You give me a blow-job I'll let you have a meal." /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean has to fight hard not to throw up, not that it would have been anything but acid. The peacekeeper is licking his lips suggestively and looking at Deans mouth. Dean has to think fast. He doesn't know what the usual prices for prostituting oneself is, and he's scared to ask too much. He looks over at the books again, Sam's birthday is coming up and he would love a book. The peacekeeper doesn't look like the guy who reads anyways, so he probably wouldn't take much for it. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Two good meals and two books and I'll let you fuck me" he says, truly disgusted at himself for going through with this. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"The peacekeeper nods eagerly, witch again makes Dean think he's charging too little. He's too hungry to worry about that though. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""You probably want to feed me first" he says instead, "unless fucking me unconscious does it for you."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He half hopes it will. Instead the peacekeeper just nods again. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Nah, I'd like you awake and screaming actually. Sit down over there" he says, pointing to a set of chairs at a table that Dean hadn't noticed before. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean shudders and chooses to ignore the screaming comment, instead heading over to the table. The peacekeeper leaves through one of the doors and returns right after Dean's sat down, arms overloaded with food. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""This is the two good meals you're getting. Eat what you want now, pick any two books and then come find me. I'll be in the bedroom. And don't take too long, I don't like to be kept waiting." The peacekeeper gives him a stern look before leaving through a different door. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean looks at the food and is shocked. He'd asked for two good meals, and he had gotten what he and Sam could live of for at least four days. This is two good meals in the peacekeepers opinion? Or does he just see how starved Dean really is? He doesn't strike Dean as a man who feels pity. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"The table is covered in bread, cheeses, ham, chicken, apples, two oranges, a jar of jam, potatoes, a jug of milk, butter and what Dean suspects is cake of some sort. The only thing on the table that he has actually tasted before is bread, milk and cheese. And this looks completely different. He carefully picks up one of the many bread rolls and breaks it open./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"The smell is overwhelming. It's fresh, warm and extremely tempting. Dean wants to shove the whole thing into his mouth at once. Wants to smell the oranges and the apples. Wants to try a little bit of everything. He remembers the Peacekeepers warning though, and he knows he will get sick if he eats too much. He carefully breaks off a bite and puts it in his mouth, and it is the most wonderful thing he's ever tasted. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"It takes all of Deans willpower not to shove his face with it. Instead he forces himself to take slow bites while he packs the remaining food in the bag he uses to carry tools at work. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"When the food is packed he brings the last part of his roll over to the bookshelf, contemplating what books to give Sam. He wants to give him something useful. Sam still has four months left of school before he starts to work full time. Until school finishes the kids are all factory workers, witch is the only thing they learn in school. When they finish at the end of august there is a test. A test that determines if you should continue as a factory worker or get one year in training to become weaver, designer, dress maker, teacher, tailor or something different. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean had been lucky, and had been chosen for the "something different." He'd spent one year learning how to fix the machines used in the factories all over. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Sam had mentioned wanting to be a teacher or a designer, but to be a teacher you had to score high on all the categories in the test. Also, Dean doesn't think Sammy would be happy teaching kids how to work in the factories all day long, and then send them off to that fate for the rest of their lives. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"One of the books catches his eyeem The Basics of Designing - Principles, Techniques and Practice, /emafter leafing through it, Dean puts it in his bag. He then continues searching for a second book. One part of his brain remembers the peacekeepers warning and begs him to hurry up, while the other begs him to take a really long time, to drag it out as long as possible. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He doesn't have to think about it much before another book catches his eye though; emthe Art of Fashion - Drawing, Sowing and Inspiration. /emIt looks perfect. Dean doesn't know much about fashion or designing, but these two books seem to cover what he knows as the basics. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He slowly puts the second book in his now stuffed bag, and places the bag by the door. He wants everything to be ready to go when he has made his empayment. /em/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He catches himself standing unmoving next to his bag for a minute. He doesn't want to think about what will happen once he gets into the peacekeepers bedroom. But he knows he has to go in there any second, and he knows he should have some rules for himself. He needs at least emone/em rule, if only to make him feel like he has some sort of control. He decides on no kissing. He will let this man fuck him. He will later suck on other mens dick and even pretend to enjoy it, if that's what they're into. But he will not let anyone kiss him. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean squares his shoulders and head for the door he saw the peacekeeper enter earlier. And if he has to stop shortly before entering to wipe off a few tears no one will ever know./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p 


	2. Chapter 2

p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean knocks carefully on the bedroom door before entering the room. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"The peacekeeper is laying on a huge bed in the middle of the equally huge room. When he sees Dean he stands up and starts taking off his uniform./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Take off your clothes" he orders, and then as an afterthought "all of them." Dean nods and starts unbuttoning his shirt. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""You can fuck me," he says, "but no kissing. Not on the mouth." The peacekeeper just nods, busy with taking off his pants. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean is just taking off his shirt when he realizes the peacekeeper is now only in his underwear. The man really is disgusting, he looks even fatter out of his uniform and he has grey hair absolutely everywhere, making Dean think the brown color of his hair must be dyed. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean looks at the white discarded uniform on the floor and wishes the man would put it back on. Instead he kicks of his shoes and unbuttons his pants. He wants to be slow, haul out the time as long as possible, but he makes a jump decision to just shove off his pants and underwear at the same time. He knows it has to happen and it's better to get it over with. Rip of the bandaid. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"The peacekeeper looks him slowly up and down, and seeming pleased he orders Dean to get on the bed. Dean crawls onto the bed and positions himself on all four. He doesn't know much about gay sex, or sex at all for that matter. But he knows this is going to hurt. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"The peacekeeper crawls onto the bed behind him and he clenches his teeth. He knows he has to relax, and he desperately tries to do so. He can feel his muscles loosening a little bit, as he draws in a steady breath./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He feels exposed in a way he's never done before, and relaxing feels the hardest thing he could possibly be doing right now. He still forces himself to relax his muscles even more, drawing yet a steady breath./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He amazingly manages to remain relaxed when two rough hands grips his ass and separates the cheeks, exposing his hole. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"When the peacekeeper shoves in dry, he realizes his attempts where pointless. It hurts, he clenches up and it hurts even more, but he can't help his body's reaction to the intrusion./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean feels like he is being ripped apart, and when the peacekeeper immediately pulls out, only to slam back in he can't help the scream that tears out of him. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean is silent after that. He bites his tongue until he can taste the blood, but he refuses to scream again. After a while it doesn't feel quite as dry, and Dean has a nasty suspicion that it's his own blood making up the lubrication. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Silent tears escape Deans eyes as the peacekeeper slams in and out of him for what feels like forever. Occasionally grunting things like "soo good" and "aah, so tight". Dean passes the time counting the tears he can see falling to the bed./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"By the time the peacekeeper finally moans and Dean can feel a wet heat inside him, he has counted thirty-seven teardrops. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"The peacekeeper pulls out of him and lies down on the bed. "You can clean up in there" he says, pointing to a door Dean hadn't seen when he entered "you can't leave my home looking like that." /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean just nods and limps his way over to his clothes and then into what turns out to be a bathroom. He takes a cloth and soaks it in water before starting to clean himself up. He starts with his upper body, washing away the sweat and the tears. He then moves to his legs. He's scared of cleaning his ass, scared of the pain it will cause./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He realizes he was right about his blood being lubrication when he finds a mixture of blood and semen running down his legs. His stomach convulses and he almost throws up, he hurriedly swallows it down before it escapes his mouth. He can't afford to loose the only food he's eaten in weeks. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean cleans his legs, and the mess running down them before rinsing the cloth. Then he slowly, carefully brings it to his ass. And immediately wishes he hadn't. He bites his teeth and continues cleaning it though. The peacekeeper is right, he can't leave looking like this. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"When he's positive there is no more cum, blood or sweat to clean he rinses the cloth again. His ass is still bleeding though, and he doesn't want to stay here to wait for it to stop. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He opts for shoving some toilet paper between his cheeks so he won't bleed through his pants. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Before getting dressed Dean takes a look in the mirror, he and Sam doesn't own one so he doesn't see his reflection often. He really does look horrible. He can count his ribs, he is deathly pale, and he can se the beginnings of two hand-shaped bruises on his too visible hip bones./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He quickly dresses and arranges his hair, avoiding his dead looking eyes in the reflection, and exits the bathroom. He finds the peacekeeper half asleep on the bed. Dean desperately wants to leave. He wants to walk out of the door and never come back to this place. He knows that he's found the only way to keep a roof over his and Sam's head, and to keep them both fed though./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""If you or any of your friends require my services another time I will be where you found me today between 6 and 6.30 pm every day" he figures it's a good plan. He gets of work just before six, so he can stop there and wait on his way home. He'll just tell Sam he got a job doing whatever./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Great," the peacekeeper says with a smile, and Dean doesn't understand how such a friendly expression can look so mean. "then I'll definitely see you again. You can show yourself out."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean doesn't need to be asked twice. He painfully makes his way out of the bedroom and into the living room. There he picks up his bag and leaves. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He painstakingly tries to walk normally, thanking heaven for the fact that he is already bowlegged, and hoping it doesn't look too weird if he just adds a little too it. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Hi Dean" he hears a female voice shout from behind him. He considers ignoring the voice, recognizing it as Jo's, but he knows it's too late. She's seen him, and she knows he heard her. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He turns and faces her instead. "Hi Jo, how are you?" He says, trying hard to act as his normal self. Although he's somehow he's all but forgotten what his 'normal self' is like. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"She ignores his question. "What are you doing here? You got off work and hour ago and this isn't even on your way.."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"She stops talking and Dean can se her eyes drifting over his stuffed bag and his awkward stance. "home. Oh no, Dean you didn't? Please tell me you didn't." /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean feigns ignorance. But he knows it's probably too late. He and Jo has been best friends since they saw their fathers executed, and she is usually able to read him like a book./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Did what? I haven't done anything. I'm just.. walking home. I got a job cleaning a peacekeepers house after work. And I need the extra cash." He knows as soon as he starts talking that she doesn't believe him./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Dean, when did you start having sex for money?" she asks, tears in her eyes. Dean hasn't seen Jo cry since the night their fathers left. Not even when they saw them shot in the face on that stage. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""I didn't.." he starts, but is interrupted before he can finish./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Don't lie to me Winchester, don't even think about it!" Jo half shouts at him./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Shh, be quiet" Dean says quickly. Then he decides to tell her the truth, knowing it's the only explanation she will accept. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""I didn't do it for money. I needed food. And a birthday gift for Sammy."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Dean" Jo says, a tear falling down her cheek. Sympathy and pleading fighting for room in her eyes. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Don't. Don't give me that look. And don't ask me to stop. Believe me, I want to." he says, voice breaking despite his effort to keep it even./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Then why don't you stop Dean? You have a job. Sam will start working full-time soon. You don't have to do this."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean knows it's not fair, but he can feel his anger raising. This has been the worst day since he had to tell Sammy their father was dead, and he can't deal with it anymore. So he lashes out./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Don't tell me I don't have to do this. Do you really think I would let some disgusting peacekeeper tear my ass open if I had another choice? I haven't eaten in two weeks Jo. All the money I make goes into paying for the room. And the food I get from my tesserae goes into feeding Sam. And before you ask, no, I'm not letting Sammy sign up for tesserae. He is never going into those horrible games. So yeah, I would like nothing more than to go home and forget this never happened. To never have to do it again. But this gets food on the table, and it gets Sammy books so he can have a chance at an actual future. I know he can get into the designer program, but that means another year of him working only part time. I can't ask him to give up his future, you know as well as I do that designers can earn emdouble /emof what a factory worker does. He's smart, and he deserves a chance."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean stops talking before he starts telling Jo about how he emhas /emto give Sammy this chance, because it's his fault he never had it in the first place. Their mom wouldn't have been at the factory the night it burned down if she hadn't changed her shift to take Dean to his first day of school. And their dad wouldn't have left if only Dean had been a better son. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Jo looks at him for a long time. Dean knows she probably wants to offer him help or food. But he also knows she can't, her family is barley getting by with what they have. After a while she nods./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Ok Dean. I'll back up whatever cover story you want to tell Sam. I don't like this at all, but I get it, I do. I want to know when you're out doing this though, and I want to know when you're going to be home."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean almost cries in relief, she understands and she accepts him. Only now does he realize how scared he was that she would reject him for this. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Yes, yes of course. I'll tell you anything you want to know."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Jo nods in appreciation./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""I'll talk to a couple of the girls at work. I know they turn tricks after work. I'll ask about typical prices, who to avoid and who to approach. If you're doing this you should be as safe as possible."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean doesn't know what to say, so he just stares at her in awe. She's actually helping him out. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""And I know that this will probably make you uncomfortable, but you need to find some sort of lubrication. And you need to learn how to stretch yourself. It looks like you're in a lot of pain right now, and that can't happen all the time."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"She's right. It does make him uncomfortable, but he knows she's right about the rest of it too./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Yeah, I know. I have a lot to learn here. I can probably get some oil for a blow-job or something, I think my ass needs a few days rest anyways." he says smiling, trying to lighten the mood. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Jo allows him, even though they both know this is the beginning of a series of horrible experiences for Dean. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Jo takes helps him carry his bag while Dean hobbles next to her. He's done pretending walking doesn't hurt. He'll have to do enough of that when he gets home. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"The rest of the way to the housing unit is silent, both of them knowing there is once again, nothing to say. Before entering their separate rooms Jo straightens Deans clothing and fixes his hair. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""You can tell Sam that cleaning story, I'll back you up if he asks me about it. Just.. be safe." she says, walking into her room before he has a chance to answer. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean takes a deep breath and slowly lets it out before walking into his own room. Sam is on the bed, writing something in his notebook. Something for school Dean thinks. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Hi Sammy, I have some great news" he says, forcing a smile on his face./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Sam groans, "Deaan, I'm almost thirteen years old now! I'm too old for you to call me Sammy. My name is Sam." he hasn't looked up at Dean yet, something Dean is grateful for. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He gets a precious few moments to sit down in one of their chairs without Sam seeing his grimace. "Did you eat?" he asks his younger brother./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Suddenly Sam looks at him with teary eyes. "No Dean, I didn't. I want you to eat today." He says it with such determination that it actually scares Dean a little. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""You've been saying that you ate before I woke up, and at work or before I came home. But I just did the math" he says pointing at his notebook. "What I'm eating is emall/em the food we get from your tesserae. Not half of it, not even most of it. ALL of it. You need to eat Dean. And I'm signing up for tesserae tomorrow as well."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean doesn't know what to say, Sam had noticed? And now he's signing up for tesserae? That is not going to happen./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Sam.." he starts, but the person in question interrupts him./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""How long has it been since you've eaten Dean? Because according to my calculations it's been two weeks today, and that can't be right. It can't, can it?" The look in Sam's eyes is pleading with Dean to tell him his wrong, so Dean does./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""No of course not Sammy, that's ridiculous. A person can't survive that long without food. I'd be dead. Or at least hallucinating and fainting all over the place." Dean has been, but Sam doesn't need to know that. "You're right that I haven't been eating too much though, but like I said, I have some good news."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean can see that Sam is skeptical to his promise. That he desperately want's to believe him, but doesn't fully do it yet. So instead of letting Sam ask more questions Dean continues talking./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""I got another job, this lazy-ass peacekeeper doesn't want to clean his own home, so he's paying me to do it after I finish at the factory. He gave me a bunch of food, look"/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"And with that Dean starts pulling all of the food out of his bag, and Sam is immediately distracted. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"This time Dean takes his time, he smells the apples and the oranges. He dips his finger in the jam and sucks his finger clean, the sweet taste spreading in his mouth. He can see Sam doing the same thing on the other side of the table. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Dean starts preparing a meal for them, he takes a bread roll for each and splits them in half. He putts butter on one half and cheese on the other. Then he cuts an apple in half and pours some milk. He considers a second before dropping a small amount of jam into the milk glasses. He knows they both needs the energy./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"He then takes a piece of chicken and puts it on Sam's plate, but he doesn't take any for himself./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Here you go Sam", he says, putting the plate in front of his brother. He waits to sit down again until Sam is distracted by the food, he knows he won't be able to help the flinching./span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""What, no chicken for you? Dean you have to eat!" Sam says, refusing to start on his food. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""I had some while I was cleaning" Dean explains "and as you pointed out, I haven't been eating too much. I need to start slow."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"Sam looks at him, considering. "Then I won't eat it either, we'll both have some tomorrow" he says, pushing the chicken to the end of his plate. /span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;""Don't be ridiculous Sam, it's going to go bad. Eat your chicken. I'll have some tomorrow."/span/p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica; min-height: 14px;" /p  
p style="margin: 0px; font-family: Helvetica;"span style="letter-spacing: 0.0px;"They sit and eat in silence for a while, and when they finish they both stumble towards their beds. Full for what feels like the first time in their lives. "Night Dean, thank you." Sam whispers before they both fall asleep, hours earlier than they normally do. /span/p 


End file.
